inauspicio.us

cast of characters i’m planning a huge party for …

cast of characters

i’m planning a huge party for persons assumed to live in my apartment. thus far, the guest list includes:

• Pizza Lover, a frequent receiver of mail from Pappa Johns. I assume him to be around thirty and to typically put in long hours at work. He is likely not married, making him an appropriate candidate to be seated next to…

• Current Single Resident, a personage I have never been acquainted with but with whom I must share some traits as I keep receiving his mail, as well.
• Customer, who must be so well known in these parts that he or she, like Madonna, needs no introduction and only a single name.
• Valued Customer, presumably related to the above.
• Rhonda, who is the intended recipient of at least a third of all calls to my cell phone.
• Smart Consumer, although he may have left town when they tore down the K-Mart.

A large contingent of the Concerned family may also live in this apartment. I’ve never seen them though, and they seem like wet blankets, so I’m just going to leave them off the list altogether. Maybe I should invite them anyway, just to see if I can get them to sort through their all their darned mail.