inauspicio.us

Alright, I got my RSS xml feed
back up again. Once again, in order to get it to do what I
wanted, I had to write it by hand. Not that it was that complex,
but seriously why all the difficulty?

TinyNewspaper
now also features RSS. Actually that’s the other way
around: RSS is working on TinyNewspaper, so this site has it
too. Anyway.

Just as I had an XML feed working, I’ve broken it. But I broke it with a pretty cool project. I took some of the stuff I’ve used on reeksofhavoc and drive safer and made myself a pretty good collaborative publishing program.

You can find it at http://www.tinynewspaper.com,
and if you feel like signing up for a free account, it gives you your
own pretty nice looking webpage, and a page for inviting other people
to be writers. It’s modeled after a newspaper – each account has
an “editor in chief” who can approve stories and invite new writers,
and writers can submit their stories for publishing.

It’s cool and it’s free. But the best part is a really cool programming hack that makes thumbnails on the fly and then caches them so that the thumbnail only has to be made once. Seriously.

AM: Swim at East Boulder Rec. Slow.

PM: 16 mile run: 30′ WU, 2 laps of res in 34:30-33:06, 5′ CD

Whipped

I was chased by six different dogs while out running last week, all in Boulder. Some owners (sorry, “guardians”) were apologetic, some surprised. One didn’t notice, or pretended not to. Jerk.

So, jerk, and all your jerk dog-apologizing friends, here is why I hate your damn dog:

• Your dog chases me. This is a big one. I do not like being chased. I am afraid of getting bitten. And the reason I don’t believe you when you say it would “never bite” is because you are the same moron who tells me that it “never chases people”
• Your dog wants to play. I am out running, not out playing with your dog. I don’t want your dog to stop me, trip me up, slobber on me, or drop that disgusting, slimy tennis ball it is carrying on my feet.
• You keep your dog on a leash, but it is 100 feet long. Between you and me, pal, that just isn’t going to cut it.
• You let your dog off-leash right next to the big signs that say “DOGS MUST BE LEASHED”. Can you not read? Or are you just an asshole? There are a dozen places ONLY for dogs in Boulder, and a thousand more where your dog can be off-leash. I know you like to pretend you are John Damned Audubon, exploring the wilderness with your dog, but you’re not. You’re on Boulder County open space, 500 yards from your SUV. There are lots of other people around.
• Speaking of your SUV, if you don’t pick up after your dog, I will pee on your windshield.
• Finally: You yell at me when your dog comes after me. What the hell? Do you think I am trying to get your dog to come play with me? Do I look like I’m out for a little obnoxious-dog-stealing? You must be the dumbest person on earth.

I saw 953 other dogs last week, too, that did not try to chase me. So to those owners, thanks, I guess. Not that I feel like I should have to thank you for not letting your dog chase me – that’s a bit like thanking someone for not punching you in the face even though they could if they wanted to – but I appreciate the courtesy.

And if you are thinking, “six out of almost 1000, that’s not too bad,” then imagine that six out of every thousand cars that you saw swerved towards you, and most of them were just playing around.

To cope with a Sunday run’s aftermath
And help your sore muscles escape the wrath
Be kind to your thighs
For this I advise
You jump in a lavendar bubble bath.

Against my own better judgement, I shaved my chest last week. I can just hear you now: “Why in God’s name would you want to do that?” And “How did it turn out?”

So back when I was in high school, and the other kids were getting chest hair (well, the other boys were getting chest hair. not too many of the girls did, i think), i never did. i started going gray at seventeen, but no chest hair. freshman, sophomore year of college, no chest hair. finally in my junior year I started to get this ugly, tiny clot of hair on my chest. by the summer of 2002 it looked like the one on the left.

which i could live with, even though it was ugly as crap. but suddenly a couple of weeks ago, someone at the theatre said, “Hey, why don’t you just shave it? That’s what I do.” Oh, good idea, i thought. i’ll do just that. and i did.

now i’ve been shaving my legs for ten years now, and my face for more than half that long. i know to use new razor blades, and i know to let the shaving cream sit for a few minutes before shaving. i also know that the best laid plans of mice and men sometimes still give you razor burn, and i’ve had razor burn a few times. never, though, have i ever had razor burn that compares with the razor burn on my chest right now. oh well. i guess i’ll have to try again. maybe i will just let a cat scratch out my pathetic excuse for chest hair.

and from the awwwwwww department, steph and i got together a year ago yesterday. i wish i could tell you we deliberately picked valentine’s day, but i’d be lying to you. these things happen when and where they will and there’s no rhyme or reason to it, nothing to do but thank your lucky stars she’s so great.

What the crap?

My brother Dan does sound design in Chicago. And he composes music. But when he composes music using protools, he winds up with a file that is way, way too big. Why does this happen? I have no idea of course. But I’ve got ahold of some of his music, and re-encoded it using the lame mp3 encoder (which, paradoxically, is awesome) and put it here. Enjoy.

And, I got a new chair. Awesome, huh? It’s really comfortable, even though there’s not much place to put it. I kind of want to move the TV so that it sits across from the chair now, even though I can’t watch TV since I get no reception at all in my apartment. I do have my workout videos though.

just to give you a break from the blinking of dan and i, i fixed the post below.

which gives me a chance to introduce you to joel. joel is playing the lead (Eddie Ryan) in our production of Do Black Patent Leather Shoes Really Reflect Up?, winner of a tony award for the longest title of a musical. and he was Seymour in Little Shop of Horrors this past summer.

in short (and as you can see) he is quite a presence on stage. he’s also a really swell guy.

Merry Christmas

Here is a charming picture of my brother and me. He is ready to bite the cameraperson; I am covered in red jello.

If you want a copy of my pictures from LOAS I 2004, send me email with your name and address, and email address. I’ll send them right after the first of the year.

It’s my new year’s resolution. Happy Holidays

its been a long time, hasnt it

[ed]: if you want the awesome picture of stephanie giving the finger, let me know. i took it down – seriously – because someone offered me money, and i am willing to sacrifice my artistic integrity for money on a case-by-case basis.